Real Love
by AddisonRae
Summary: FIN And now our tale comes to a close...
1. Chapter One : Prolouge

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Title: Real Love

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Author: AddisonRae

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Rating: PG13

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Genre: Romance, Drama, Humor

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Warnings: cheating on spouse. Mild language.

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Summary: UPDATED AND REVAMPED! Now we get some of the back story, a court scene, and the plot thickens…

Hermione Granger pounded her fist against the smooth wood of the large door she was currently staring at. The door did not respond, but the man inside did. A man with long, pale blonde hair and chiseled facial features opened the door, groggily wiping the sleep from his eyes. He stared at her blankly, and then moved to allow her to pass.

"He's gone and done it again!" Hermione screamed.

"It's bloody three in the morning!" Lucius Malfoy grumbled.

Hermione whipped round and glared furiously at him. The much taller, much stronger blonde man cowered under her glare. He gestured for her to enter the kitchen. Hermione felt Lucius' hand rest comfortingly on her back and relaxed slightly. He pulled out a chair for her and she sat across from him. Lucius set about making tea and let Hermione vent, he knew releasing her stress would make her much better company.

"He was with her! Again!" Hermione hissed angrily.

"By 'her' I assume you mean the Weasley twit?" he sneered.

"Yes! He was with HER…in MY bed!"

Lucius stopped now. He turned to Hermione, drinking in the sight of her. She was furious, her face slightly pink from crying and yelling yet again. Her petite frame was complemented by the rather small nightgown she was wearing. Lucius pictured her coming home form another late night at the office and seeing her husband in bed with his mistress. Adding insult to the injury was the fact that it was her bed. He felt the sudden urge to strangle The Boy Who Stole The Best Woman In The World.

"So what did you do?" Lucius asked calmly.

"The usual. I yelled a little. Cried a little…and then I came here." Hermione said quietly, "I'm sorry I woke you. I'll just leave."

"He doesn't deserve you, Hermione." Lucius said softly.

Hermione froze in the doorway. She slowly turned. Lucius had gotten up to follow her and she found herself staring at his well-built chest. Her gaze slowly grazed up his torso to meet his slate gray eyes. Harry's eyes had never held that much emotion when he looked at her. He saved that for Ginny. Try as she might, Hermione couldn't even hate Ginny. She knew that Ginny had loved Harry for years, and she knew Harry had loved her. But after Ron's death it just seemed natural for her and Harry to marry. She regretted it every day. Lucius' hands found her arms and he turned her all the way around, pulling her gently from the doorway.

"He doesn't deserve you. He doesn't love you. You've never experienced real love." Lucius whispered in her ear.

"I…I can't go back there, Luc." Hermione whimpered. "I can't see them again."

"If you stay here, I might not be able to control myself." Lucius muttered huskily.

"Good. I could use a dose of real love." Hermione said.

Lucius quickly pulled her closer. His lips found hers and soon there was a craze of frantic hands and fingers, pulling and tugging at buttons and zippers. Mouths bit and tasted flesh, and uttered soft moans of pleasure. And Harry Potter watched it all, from the kitchen doorway. He smiled lightly to himself, and let the divorce papers on the hallway table.


	2. Chapter Two: In The Beginning

"Lucius Xavier Malfoy, charged with treason, crimes against the Ministry, bribery and supporting the rise of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. How do you plead, sir?"

"Guilty. On all counts," came the smooth reply.

"You do realize you just signed your life away?" the Ministry witch asked with a raised eyebrow, suddenly dropping her professional persona.

"Ever heard of '_released for good behavior_,' Minister Bones?"

"Very well, Lucius. You are being sentenced to twenty years in Azkaban. May Merlin have pity on your poor soul." Minister Bones appeared to be wiping her eyes, as the Dementors re-entered the room.

"WAIT!"

The occupants of the room turned to see a harried looking witch, donning smartly-buttoned black robes with unruly curls flying down the walk. "Wait!" she called.

"And who, may I ask, are you, young lady?"

"Miss Hermione Jane Granger, representing the defense," the woman answered smugly. "Did you really think you'd sentence this man without a fair trial?"

"Miss Granger, with all due respect, Mr. Malfoy has already plead guilty, and issued a complete confession." Bones said smugly.

"And he is now issuing a retraction, Minister."

"Mr. Malfoy?"

"Oh, absolutely."

Lucius Malfoy sat back in his chair, putting his arms behind his head and surveying the form of the witch in front of him. He looked clearly amused.

"Miss Granger, proceed."

"Thank you, Minister. Mr. Malfoy, where were you on the evening of October thirty-first, nineteen ninety-seven?" Hermione asked, begginning to pace back and forth in front of the witness stand.

"At Hogwarts, madam." Lucius replied smoothly.

"And why were you at Hogwarts, Mr. Malfoy?"

"I was a guest. Invited to attend the Halloween Feast, you see."

"Ah, and after your recent release from Azkaban did you think it altogether wise to attend an affair that the Dark Lord had planned to attack?" Hermione asked, mockly scolding.

A shadowed look crossed Lucius' face. Bitterness laced his answer.

"I was not aware of the attack."

"You were not informed, by your Lord, Mr. Malfoy?" Hermione asked imploringly.

"No."

"Is there anyone who can attest to this, Mr. Malfoy?" Hermione sounded very smug.

A mumble in response. Hermione's mouth twitched. She stopped her abuse of the stone dungeon floor, pausing in front of her client.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Malfoy, can you speak up?"

"My son." He hissed.

Hermione resumed her pacing.

"I call to the stand Mr. Draco Xavier Malfoy, Minister," she said smugly.

"But, he's in Azkaban!"

"Yes, and you can just peddle those horrid monsters over there to fetch him." Hermione snapped back.

"Court is in recess, will reconvene at approximately three o'clock." Minister Bones said resignedly.

_Click. _The gavel had dropped.

------

"Miss Granger, what a…pleasant surprise."

"Mr. Malfoy." Hermione nodded.

"Exactly why have you come rushing to the defense of a Death Eater, Mudblood?" Lucius asked snarkily.

Hermione whipped around, slamming her hands down on the armrests of the stone chair her client was bound to. They were alone in the courtroom, as she had requested.

"Let's get one thing straight, Malfoy," she said viciously. "I don't have to help you. A respected friend has asked me to do this, and if I do, rest assured you will be walking out of this hell-hole a free man by the end of tomorrow. But one more comment like that, _Mr. Malfoy_, and I may just slip up on my notes, and let some scandalous information become common knowledge. We wouldn't want _that_, now would we?"

"What possible information could you have, Miss Granger, that could make my situation any worse?"

Hermione bent closer and whispered something in the cocky man's ear. He paled.

"You wouldn't."

"Or would I?"

----------------------------

"Court is in session!" Click. "Miss Granger, your witness."

"Thank you, Minister." Hermione nodded, turning to face the stand. "You are Draco Xavier Malfoy, correct?"

"Yes."

"And when was Veritaserum administered?" asked Hermione.

"Directly prior to my entering the courtroom." Draco answered.

"Mr. Malfoy, your father tells us he was not aware of plans to attack Hogwarts on the night of October thirty-first, nineteen ninety-seven. Is this true?"

"Yes." Draco replied flatly.

"Can you elaborate, Mr. Malfoy?" Hermione asked politely.

"Certainly. The Dark Lord had only informed his followers that were attending Hogwarts at the time of the attack. We were to administer the potion to the house elves, and contaminate the Feast with a botched sleeping potion."

"And, in effect, Mr. Malfoy, what would this potion have done?"

"The potion, when brewed correctly, works much like Dreamless Sleep, giving the patient completely restful sleep. With…added ingredients, it becomes a fatalpotion, and the patient never awakens."

"Thank You, Mr. Malfoy." Hermione said. "I call Lucius Xavier Malfoy, please."

Draco was removed from the stand and his father replaced him in the cold stone seat. Shackles immediately encased his wrists. The blonde man rolled his eyes haughtily at the guard.

"Mr. Malfoy, if you are innocent, why would you confess?" Hermione asked, unable to mask a slight hint of genuine curiosity.

"Miss Granger, do you really believe pleading innocent would have gained any different result?" Lucius asked simply.

"Point, Mr. Malfoy. And Check. Minister, I rest my case."

Hermione silently seated herself next to Lucius, her eyes never leaving the woman in front of her. Luciu scast a sidelong glance at her, but said nothing. He merely glared at the shackles that never touhed her pale wrist.

The minister raised her eyebrows, sighing loudly. "Cleared, Mr. Malfoy." _Click._


	3. Chapter Three: Freedom and Containment

Lucius Malfoy was encased in bright sunlight. Having just risen from underground into a Muggle phone booth. Soon, however, his peaceful freedom was interrupted.

When one Hermione Granger joined him in the booth, smashing his face into the warm glass.

"My apologies, Mr. Malfoy." Hermione said, a slight trace of amusement in her voice.

"No worries, Miss Granger." he snapped, "I suppose if it wasn't for you I'd be on my way to a much less appealing fate."

"Quite."

Hermione reached past Lucius and pushed the door open. She brushed past him quickly and blinkingly stepped into the afternoon, eyes adjusting after the dark elevator trip. Lucius followed her out of the booth, and Hermione quickly began her journey away.

"Miss Granger?" Lucius called, sounding annoyed as he pushed through a crowd of Muggles.

Hermione turned to survey the look of distaste on his face as he did so, and could not help but smirk. _Serves him right._

"Might I ask who the '_friend_' you spoke of was? The one who asked you to… come to my defense?"

"Not a friend, per say, more of a…colleague." Hermione answered carefully.

"A name, Miss Granger?" Lucius pressed.

"I really think, Mr. Malfoy, that if my colleague wished you to know, they would inform you themselves."

"I am indebted, it appears, Miss Granger, and I have not yet paid your salary." Lucius said as she yet again attempted to walk away.

"I asked no salary, Mr. Malfoy, I'm not a lawyer." Hermione answered shortly.

"You aren't?" Lucius stopped his pursuit of the woman, his aristocratic sneer momentarily disappeared from his face. He recovered himself quickly. "Than one must assume you are quite the accomplished actress, Madam."

"I suppose one might, or they could say I watch far to much Muggle television."

Hermione grinned to herself as Lucius scoffed at her reply, clearly yet again insulting her parentage. It really was quite easy to get a rise out of him.

"Then again…I did date a lawyer once." Hermione mused suddenly, forgetting her current company.

"You consort with Muggles regularly?" Lucius sneered.

"I suppose you would have me completely disown my family, at the age of eleven? Upon discovering my _superior_ abilities? Or, Mr. Malfoy, are you of the opinion that I should have ignored my gift and not have attended Hogwarts?" Hermione's tone was mild, but her eyes flashed as she spun to stare up at him.

"I am of the opinion…"

"Yes?"

"Miss Granger, I cannot properly insult someone who just granted me my freedom." Lucius answered silkily. "Perhaps we can continue this conversation after my odd and slightly annoying gratitude has run its course."

"No, Mr. Malfoy, I seriously doubt either of us shall after have the desire or opportunity to continue this conversation. Good day to you, Sir." Hermione said briskly.

Lucius nodded in acknowledgement, and thoughtfully watched her walk away.

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**__**

Miss Hermione Granger (and date),

The Ministry is hosting a Christmas Eve Ball,

to be held on the Night of December 31 beginning at

seven o'clock and ending after midnight. You are

cordially invited. Please R.S.V.P. to Margaret Bagins,

Head Of Events.

Minister Amelia Bones

Order of Merlin, Third Class

Hermione rolled her eyes slightly. And turned to the letter accompanied her invitation. She broke the familiar seal and surveyed Molly Weasley's pleasant scrawl.

**__**

Hermione,

Don't think you'll be avoiding it! Arthur and I

Expect to see you and Harry there, dear, as we're

not having Christmas at the burrow this year.

Happy Holidays!

Molly

Hermione groaned softly. There was no escaping it, then. She'd have to go. With Harry. Hermione slumped down in her seat, her head slamming onto the smooth wood of her kitchen table. Light filtered brightly through the sheer yellow curtains that adorned the window over the sink.

"Hermione?" a voice called from the front room.

"Kitchen." She yelled back.

"Hey, I was wondering if you'd---" the voice stopped. "You got yours too, then?"

"Yes, Evan. I got it."

"Well, then I guess I have a date, eh?" The young man grinned cheekily, sitting down across from her.

Evan Carter was a flamboyant wizard of the age of twenty-seven. He had light coloring, blonde curls shaggily framing his face, clearly overgrown, and bright blue eyes shining with a mischievous glint. Hermione's roommate had been living with her for five years, ever since she had moved out of her parents house at eighteen and went to University.

"Evan, you know I have to go with Harry…"

"No, Hermione! You will not do that to yourself again!" Evan hissed angrily.

"Evan…Harry and I are engaged." Hermione said nervously.

"Bloody hell." He sat back in his seat, pale and shaking. "Hermione, you don't love him! Everyone knows he's been head over heels for --"

"Evan! I do not need you to criticize my decision, I need you to support it!" she snapped.

"…Alright, Hermione. I'm here for you. But I don't like it."


	4. Chapter Four: Christmas Eve Ball

"Welcome, members of the magical community, to the annual Christmas Eve Ball." Minister Bones was seated at the High Table in the Merlin Ballroom. Resplendent in a gold dress, she beamed out at the crowd, a large gathering of the Who's-Who of the Wizarding world. "And now, let the festivities begin!"

With these magic words, the light dimmed, music played, and food appeared on tables surrounding the dance floor. Neville made his way onto the floor, dragging a reluctant Luna behind him. Harry and Hermione were seated at one of the round tables, watching in amusement as their friend thoroughly embarrassed his new bride.

"If anyone can embarrass Luna, you know they're nutters." Harry laughed.

"Or Neville."

"True." he nodded in assent, his eyes straying from the couple to a flash of scarlet on the dance floor.

Hermione knew who Harry was watching. She didn't mind really. Hermione knew that her and Harry's engagement was really just a expectation of everyone involved with them. It seemed natural. After Ron's death, Harry and Hermione had felt empty and taken comfort in each other. The world around them saw it as something much more than it was.

Hermione watched as Ginny was spun around the dance floor by a tall, dark man with a sparkling smile. Her latest boyfriend. Hermione had stopped keeping track of their names, knowing none of them lasted for very long after the approval or scorn of the Weasley family. Ginny had eyes only for Harry.

The view of the bubbling redhead was blocked momentarily by an expanse of the shiny black fabric of a well-made tuxedo. Hermione's eyes traveled upwards into the blank face of a man she thought she'd never have the displeasure of meeting again.

"Mr. Malfoy." she nodded courteously.

"Miss Granger, enjoying your evening?" Lucius politely inquired.

Harry suddenly seemed to have came to the realization that Hermione was indeed holding a conversation with Lucius Malfoy. He stopped watching the dance floor and glared angrily at Lucius, raising to his full height, which was still a good few inches shorter than his adversary.

"Ah, Mr. Potter, how nice of you to come to reality and join us."

"Malfoy, leave her alone." Harry hissed.

"Harry, don't-"

"Miss Granger and I were just making polite conversation, Mr. Potter." Lucius sneered, "She did do me quite a favor that I have yet to repay."

Harry's glare deepened, and Lucius' sneer grew. Hermione rolled her eyes, and stood up.

"Excuse me gentlemen, this brute display of testosterone grows tiring." She said icily.

"Of course, Miss Granger, allow me to escort you?"

Hermione shot Lucius a startled look of surprise, and Harry jumped quickly to her side

"I will escort my fiancé, Malfoy." Harry hissed.

"Ah…of course. Adieu, madam, Mr. Potter." and with that, Lucius walked away.

"Hermione, what did you do for him?" Harry rounded on her.

"Harry, do you not remember a highly publicized court case a few months ago?" Hermione said, as if explaining why one and one must equal two.

"He's still on about that?"

"Well, he seems to think he is indebted, but I haven't exactly seen him since. Harry, calm down, I'm going to talk to Molly." Hermione snatched her arm away from her fiancé and stalked across the room.

"Hermione, dear, you look wonderful!" Molly Weasley gushed, taking in Hermione's perfect curls, and eyeing the low-cut black gown, clearly surprised.

"Thank you Molly, you look wonderful as well."

Molly waved her off, muttering something about nonsense. She then grinned widely. "Harry told us, dear. We're thrilled for you."

"Thank you, Molly." Hermione repeated softly.

" Have you set a date? Made any plans. You know how men are, Harry had no clue.."

"Oh, Molly its really happened so quickly…er…I think I'm leaning towards a small ceremony."

"I see."

Telling Molly Weasley 'small ceremony' was equivalent to 'We're canceling Christmas'.

"Well then, dear, We'll just have to find you a gorgeous dress. You hair looks lovely down dear, but for a wedding I really think…"

Hermione tuned Molly out as she bustled on with plans. The excitement she had always expected to feel just wasn't there. It didn't feel right. Molly could put her In jeans and a T-shirt for her wedding and she wouldn't care.

Why don't I care?

"Hermione?"

"Hello, Remus." Hermione smiled, coming out of her revere.

"Do you think Harry would mind if I stole his lovely fiancé for a dance?"

"Of course not." Hermione grinned.

Waving goodbye to Molly, she took Lupin's hand and allowed him to lead her onto the dance floor. Laughter soon came over her, and she was twirled around by various friends and members of the Order. Harry spoke to Bill and Mr. Weasley, watching from the refreshment table.


	5. Chapter Five: Christmas and A Wedding

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1271 words this time around. W00t. I don't know quite how long this fiction is going to shape up to be. At the moment I have ten chapters sort of planned, but no clear ending. It could be less, it could be more. Thanks to all the reviewers, especially prin69, who spotted a mistake, and CharmedLeoLvr, and CareBareErin, who have each reviewed several times.

Hermione Granger arrived at her flat just after one on Christmas morning. The Ministry Ball had run slightly late, and she was happy to have escaped as early as she did. Harry had been moody all night, glaring openly at Ginny's boyfriend, only pausing to make a scathing remark about Lucius Malfoy. He had been the only shock of the night. Politeness isn't something Hermione had normally associated with the Malfoys.

Hermione quickly rid herself of her cumbersome and tedious evening attire and sank into her bed. Sleep came quickly, but was fitful.

-----------

The next morning, Hermione awoke to an arrangement of pink roses waving in her face.

"Ouch." thorns poked her and tangled in her hair, and Hermione felt a weight depress from the side of the bed.

"Miss Granger? Dobby is bringing you flowers from Master Potter, miss." The elf squeaked as she shoved the roses away and conjured up a vase on her bedside table.

"Err…Thank you Dobby, but couldn't you just…shake me or something?"

As soon as she'd said this, a look of stricken mortification crossed the elf's large face. His round eyes grew to the size of saucers, and his bat-like ears drooped. He began to punch himself repeatedly in the nose.

"Dobby! Dobby I forbid you to punish yourself!" Hermione hissed, slightly panicked.

"Dobby must go back to the Manor, Miss Granger. Happy Christmas." The elf looked happy to have escaped.

Hermione rolled her eyes and grabbed the card from her bouquet. Pink roses. _Blech. _Hadn't she told Harry she despised pink roses?

"To Hermione, a wonderful person and my best friend, love Harry." She read aloud, snorting ruefully to herself. "Doesn't exactly scream love and passion, does it Crooks?" The orange cat surveyed her with half opened eyes, lolling on its back as a command to be paid attention by its master. "Sometimes I think you own me instead of the other way around."

Hermione pulled on her bathrobe and padded barefoot down the hall and into the small but neatly arranged kitchen, intent on the morning coffee that she couldn't function properly without. There were presents under the tree, they would have arrived overnight from her parents and the Weasleys. Hermione finished preparing her coffee and settled herself into an armchair next to the tree.

A Weasley sweater, rock cakes, a new toothbrush, perfume, and several books later she was on her last gift. A small boxed wrapped in iridescent silver paper twinkled at her from its spot under the tree. Reflecting the many blinking white lights like stars across a morning sky. She pulled away the thin green bow and peeled back the paper. Opening the box, she found a pair of delicate diamond earrings.

"Who…?"

Hermione pulled out all piece of folded parchment.

"To Miss Hermione Granger, with much gratitude, Lucius Malfoy."

__

Bloody Hell.

-----------------

"Morning, Hermione." Harry called several hours later as he pushed open her front door.

"Afternoon, actually, Harry." Hermione raised an eyebrow.

"Oh right, I stayed at the Burrow last night, you know how those Weasleys are…" Harry grinned sheepishly.

"Right, Harry. Happy Christmas."

Happy Christmas, Harry!" Evan called from the kitchen.

"Happy Christmas to you too, Evan." Harry said absently, staring at Hermione. "Did you do something with your hair?"

"No, Harry."

"New shirt?" a weak venture, to be sure.

"I am wearing robes, Harry" Hermione seemed slightly exasperated, Harry tried again.

"Nice try, mate." Evan laughed loudly.

"Did you….are you wearing makeup?" Harry asked, clearly puzzled and ignoring Evan.

"No, Harry."

"Where did you get those?"

"What?" Hermione asked, clearly growing weary of his banter.

"Those earrings, I've never seen them before." Harry said triumphantly, obviously pleased with himself.

"Oh…they were a Christmas present."

"From who?"

"My parents." Hermione mumbled nonchalantly. Evan snorted.

"Ah, well they look nice."

"Thank you, Harry."

"Now, shouldn't we be making a guest list or something?" Harry asked.

"Yes, we still have to narrow our list down to two hundred and fifty guests." Hermione answered, pulling a folder labeled "Wedding Plans" and stuffed with parchment from a drawer.

"And how many is on the list now?"

"Oh, I'd say about five-hundred--"

"Bloody Hell!" Harry interrupted.

"--more than you can invite." Evan finished.

"You're telling me there is over seven hundred people on that list?" Harry asked incredulously.

"Yes, Harry."

"Do we even know seven hundred bloody people?"

"Harry, between my family, the Weasleys, school friends, and Ministry colleagues, plus the people we are obligated to invite, yes we do." Hermione said patiently.

"Well, just cut out all the Slytherins then."

"Harry! Alastor Moody is a Slytherin! Not to mention Barry Widdows!" Hermione said scolding, "We'll have to invite the Malfoys as well…"

"WHAT?"

"Harry, Mr. Malfoy has been exceedingly polite, and they are very influencing members of society."

"I wont have any bloody Malfoy's at my wedding!" Harry roared.

"Then I suppose you better find someone else to marry, hadn't you?" Hermione yelled back, storming down the hall and slamming her bedroom door.

Even looked up from his spot at the kitchen table. "Giver her until tomorrow, and she'll be fine. I'll talk to her, mate."

"Thanks, Evan." And with that, Harry left.

---------------

Hermione sat quietly at the long, linen covered table, surrounded be her family and various Weasleys. White tulle was blinding, and the food was mediocre. This was not how she had planned her wedding.

"Hermione, dear, it's time for the first dance." Molly said quietly as Mrs. Granger wiped away a few stray tears.

"Oh, right." Hermione stood, pushing back her chair, and met Harry on the dance floor. He was a terrible dancer.

"Sorry, Hermione." He grinned apologetically as he stepped on her foot yet again.

"No worries, Harry."

Mercifully, the song ended, and Harry left the dance floor.

"May I dance with the bride?"

Hermione turned to see Lucius Malfoy, looking achingly wealthy in his black silk dress robes. She nodded in acknowledgement as he guided her back onto the floor.

"Aren't brides supposed to be blushing and happy, or am I misinformed?"

"I am happy!" Hermione said firmly.

"Then why, Miss Granger, does it seem as if you are convincing yourself?" his question was polite, but it sent a sharp stab into Hermione's chest.

"I am not trying to convince myself, Mr. Malfoy." Hermione said firmly yet again, "And I never got a chance to thank you, for the earrings." A mere smirk assured Hermione that he had noticed her wearing them. "They are beautiful."

"A small token of appreciation, Mrs. Potter, "Lucius paused to take in her discomfort at the title.

"Its Granger. I am keeping my maiden name."

"Ah. It appears our time is over, then, Miss Granger." Lucius nodded politely. "Adieu." he handed her a box, larger than the first but still quite small, wrapped again in the beautiful silver paper. "Congratulations, may you be very happy together." he turned away, and vanished.

Hermione excused herself from her guests and escaped quickly to the bathroom, where she hurriedly unwrapped the box. Nestled against the deep green velvet was a simple diamond pendant, brilliantly cut and suspended from a delicate silver chain. Hermione fastened the necklace around her neck, and shrank the box, leaving it on a table in the Hall, inside a brightly wrapped gift bag. She re-entered the ballroom and went to her parents and Harry.

"Oh, Hermione that necklace is stunning!" her mother exclaimed.

"Thank you, Mum." Hermione muttered softly.

"And those earring as well, how lovely."

Harry looked sharply at Hermione, no doubt noticing her mother's amazement with jewelry she had supposedly given, but said nothing.


	6. Chapter 6: The Aftermath

"_Well_?"

Harry Potter stood in the center of a large, ornate room. The Honeymoon Suite at the _Le Carle_. Hands on hips, eyes narrowed, and chin defiantly aimed skyward he examined his new bride suspiciously as she sat in her dressing gown pulling flowers from her stiff, wooden-looking hair.

"Well what?" she asked absently, pulling a branch of particularly ornery baby's breath from her coiffure.

"Who are they from, Hermione?" Harry hissed.

Hermione dropped the lock of hair and turned to face him now, genuine confusion causing small frown lines to appear on her brow. "What on earth are you talking about, Harry?" she snapped briskly.

"Who. Gave. You. The. Jewelry?"

"Oh. That." Hermione answered flippantly. She returned her gaze to the vanity mirror, and took up the lock of hair again.

"Hermione Jane Granger who gave you the bloody diamonds and why?" Harry hissed, growing redder in the face by the minute.

"That Hermione Jane Granger Potter, sir, as you'd do well to remember" Hermione bit out scathingly, "They were a Christmas gift, and the necklace was a wedding gift, not that it is any concern of yours!"

"What kind of a wedding gift is that?"

"Oh, I'm sorry Harry, did you want to wear it?" Hermione asked mock-sweetly.

"Hermione, who gave them to you?"

"Why?"

"Because a man ought to know who is giving his bloody wife jewelry on their wedding day!"

"Why Harry? Because you didn't?"

"And?"

"YOU FORGOT THE BLOODY RING HARRY JAMES POTTER!" Hermione roared, spinning around and standing to face him, arms stiff and hands clenched.

"GINNY HAD IT!" Harry screamed in reply, "It's not like I lost the bloody thing!"

"Oh, right. Ginny had it. I'm sure she was taking excellent care of it, wasn't she Harry? Why, I'll bet she even _wore_ it. You know, for SAFE KEEPING!"

"I…well…not relevant…what the bloody hell is that supposed to mean?"

"You know damn well what it means!"

"That's it! I'm leaving!" Harry grabbed his cloak and stormed toward the door, "I don't have to take this!"

"Get used to it, Harry, I'm your wife you DO have to take it!"

SLAM!

Hermione slumped back into her seat at the vanity. Wonderful. This is exactly how she'd pictured her wedding night.

__

I'll bet I know where he's going… she thought viciously.

**__**

Hermione,

I'm so sorry for the way I acted last night. It was uncalled for. Your things are your business and I had no right to dig. I'm sorry I ruined our Honeymoon, Hermione. I hope you can forgive me.

Harry

A. Pink. Bloody. Rose.

Blech!

Hermione threw the rose in the bin and wiped up a few stray leaves and petals, then held the parchment before her and slowly and deliberately burning it with the tip of her ignited wand. Bloody prick. That letter had Ginny Weasley's dictation written all over it. Hermione rolled her eyes. Some people are just painfully transparent.

Hermione plodded barefoot through the kitchen of her small flat, walking around taped up cardboard boxes. She had yet to move her things into Harry's much larger, much more extravagant home. Somehow, the thought of moving in to Godric's Hollow now seemed even more tiresome to her.

What kind of a man walks out on his wedding night?

What kind of a wife is relieved when he does?

Hermione sighed heavily and made her way to the bathroom to shower and dress, before heading out the door and Apparating . She reappeared in front of a teetering building with too many stories and chickens in the yard, and for the first time she could remember upon doing so, instead of a feeling of peace, foreboding filled her.

"Hermione, dear, do come in." Mrs. Weasley bustled out of the open front door and waved Hermione inside, proceeding into the miss-matched kitchen, where a flash of red hair was seen running upstairs.

"Ginny." Harry said absently, "You know how she is about company seeing her first thing in the morning." This earned him a glare, as he clearly was no longer considered 'company' in the youngest Weasley's eyes. Harry shrunk slightly before raising up and beaming brightly.

"Hermione, I'm so glad you've come. Shall we stop by your flat to gather your things before we head home?" Harry asked jovially, clearly forgetting that he was the one being forgiven and not the other way around.

Hermione slumped into a seat across from him as Mrs. Weasley piled sausages on top of a high-stacked plate of pancakes and shoved it in front of her, muttering about what a shame it all was.

"I suppose." she answered softly, piling in the food and ignoring Harry's rather cheery mood.


	7. Chapter 7: The Ministry

****

753 words. Getting juicy, eh? Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed!

Hermione Granger stormed down the long, winding corridors of the Ministry of Magic. She paused at a smooth wooden door labeled Hermione Granger, Laws and Regulations, before slamming it open and shutting it loudly behind her. She slumped against the wood, shielding her eyes against the bright artificial lights of her own personal hell.

Charts, Graphs and Pictures were pinned neatly to every inch of available wall space, files and folders were neatly stacked in or around boxes filled with newspaper clippings and magazine articles. The only messy area of the room seemed to be a large inbox crammed with files, letters and papers.

Clearly Evan had been slacking.

"EVAN!" she shrieked, crossing the room and plopping down into the comfortable desk chair, repeatedly beating her forehead against the surface of her desk. Evan Carter came bounding into the room, wand raised. Seeing his roommate abusing her forehead and her desk, his arm dropped and face softened. He quickly ran to her and grabbed her head, forcing her to desist her hammering.

"You bellowed, love?" He asked cheekily.

"Evan Reese Carter, the only thing I ask of you, your one task, your job in a nutshell, is to keep my inbox tidy. You bloody purpose in life should be doing so. I go on vacation for one weekend for my bloody _honeymoon_ and LOOK at this mess!" She whined pitifully.

"Ah, right." He grinned guiltily. "You see, I…erm…may have…forgotten?"

"You. Purpose. In. Life. EVAN!" Hermione hissed.

Evan began to massage her temples, whispering soothing words of comfort and slowly moving her head downwards until it rested on the desk and soft, rhythmic breathing could be heard. He pointed his wand and her desk seemed to melt to a soft pillowed-top. He then took the inbox and went through an adjoining door to his office, set on righting his friend's temper.

Two hours later, Evan re-entered Hermione's office to find her absent. Checking his watch, he assumed the lack of coffee had sent her sniffing down in the cafeteria. He set the inbox back in its place and quietly left the room.

Hermione moved numbly into the elevator and pressed the button corresponding to the tea room as she leaned against the corner and prepared for the inevitable jerky movement. All her life Hermione had hated elevators. Almost as much as she hated Portkeys and Flying. Apparating was also much loathed, but a necessity so she had adapted and come to terms with the discomfort.

"Miss Granger." a voice acknowledged cordially.

Hermione's head shot up, and she was instantly awakened from her caffeine-lacking stupor.

"Malfoy." she said blankly, "What are you doing here?"

"Filing a few papers, Miss Granger." he answered politely. "Rough day?"

Hermione looked at him curiously until she remembered her unorthodox position in the elevator corner and haggard appearance.

"Rough lifetime, more like." she muttered.

Lucius Malfoy then did something that completely fascinated and horrified Hermione.

He threw his head back and laughed.

"I assure you, Miss Granger, I share your sentiments." he replied.

"Er…right." Hermione heard the soft ding, indicating the elevator had stopped, and looked up to see 'tea room' illuminated in bright green lettering above the door. "Well, that's my stop." she muttered, "Good day, Mr. Malfoy."

"Miss Granger." he nodded with a slight smirk.

Mercifully, the doors slid open and Hermione left the elevator without a backward glance.

"Muah!"

Hermione fluttered into Evan's office and kissed him loudly on the cheek before bouncing away and settling herself at her desk. Evan grinned to himself and rolled his eyes.

"And the good Lord said, let there be coffee and chocolate for females everywhere."

Hermione began to sift through the paperwork that had accumulated over her short vacation, mumbling to herself as she went.

"Anti-Elf Legislation, damned Umbridge bitch, Cauldron Thickness Mandate, Percy get off my ass, Divorce Petition, Muggle Le….wait…..Divorce Petition?" Hermione looked at the parchment curiously.

Wizarding Divorces were very rare. In fact she had only seen two cross her path since beginning her work with the Ministry two years before. Hermione softly read the parchment to herself, and then let out a shocked squeak. Evan came running into the room and snatched the offered parchment, reading it quickly aloud.

"Mrs. Narcissa Malfoy, hereafter known as "Miss N. Black", requests to involve in divorce proceedings, separating herself from husband Lucius Xavier Malfoy, on this day…" Evan stopped. "Bloody hell!" he said softly.

"Indeed." Hermione agreed. Slumping in her seat and staring blankly at her employee.


	8. Chapter 8: Return to Court

****

886 words. Hmm…Thanks to my reviewers, here goes:

"Miss Narcissa Athena Black Malfoy, bringing forth divorce proceeding against her husband, Lucius Xavier Malfoy. I open the floor, Miss Granger."

"Thank you, Minister." Hermione muttered courteously, turning to face the snooty expression of the shrewd blonde before her.

One could tell Narcissa Malfoy had once been a very beautiful woman, weather age or disposition had sullied her features was uncertain, but she had the look of a woman disheartened, feeling much self-importance and little care for others.

"Mrs. Malfoy-"

"Miss Black, if you please." Narcissa cut in viciously.

"Ah, but Madam, you are legally Mrs. Narcissa Black Malfoy until the end of this proceeding, if you receive the outcome you desire, and you shall be referred to as such." Hermione answered politely, some sting to her tone, "Mrs. _Malfoy_, could you please tell us why you have chosen to terminate your connection with Mr. Malfoy after almost twenty-five years of marriage?"

"Which accusation would you like me to elaborate on, Miss Granger? I believe you have the request?"

"Mrs. Malfoy, please answer the questions directly." the Minister cut in, "Miss Granger, perhaps you could specify…?"

"Of course, Minister." Hermione smiled. "Mrs. Malfoy, could you please elaborate upon your accusations of neglect, abuse, and infidelity?"

"Absolutely. Lucius has kept many a mistress, mentally and physically abused both our son and myself, and we haven't had proper sex in damn near fifteen years. If that doesn't qualify as neglect I don't know what does." Narcissa bit out snobbishly.

"Mrs. Malfoy, are you aware that Mr. Malfoy's statement implies infidelity and neglect on your part as well?" Hermione inquired flatly.

"That is absurd!" Narcissa snapped.

"I see. I call Mr. Lucius Xavier Malfoy to the stand, Madam, you are excused." Hermione said firmly without looking up from her papers.

A few moments later, after Narcissa had passed her husband, glaring furiously, and he had taken the stand, he was swore in and Hermione resumed pacing. Her heels clacked a rhythm on the rough stone floor of the courtroom.

"Mr. Malfoy, could you please describe your accounts of your wife's infidelity and neglect?"

"Certainly, Miss Granger." Lucius answered pleasantly, earning a raised eyebrow from Hermione, as well as many members of the jury, "My wife has had several affairs, and when she is at home, a rare occasion, I assure you, she secludes herself in her room, coming out only at mealtimes, seeing only our son."

"Mr. Malfoy, do you have witnesses of said extra-marital affairs?" Hermione asked.

"Oh, yes. Severus can justify anything I say here."

"Thank you, Mr. Malfoy, you are excused." Hermione dismissed him with a wave of her hand, he stepped down and sat behind her advisors on the defending side of the courtroom. "I call to the stand Professor Severus Alexander Snape."

Snape came down the long walk in the center of the courtroom and took his seat at the stand. He nodded politely at Hermione, who bit back a returning smile. Years of working together at Order headquarters and her Potions Apprenticeship had forced them into an odd sort of friendship.

"Professor Snape, have you bore witness to any affairs on Mrs. Malfoy's part?" Hermione began.

"Mrs. Malfoy has…companionship from several of my…colleagues."

"I see, Professor, without naming any of Mrs. Malfoy's 'companions', could you give us a number?" Hermione prodded.

"At least three, to my knowledge, Miss Granger." Snape answered smoothly.

"And has Mr. Malfoy ever abused his wife or son?" Hermione inquired.

"Not as far as I have seen."

"Thank you, Professor." Hermione allowed a small grin, to which Snape again nodded. "Minister, and ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the accounts of our witness has shown that not only has Mrs. Malfoy participated in extra-marital affairs, but she has shown neglect upon her family, as she has accused Mr. Malfoy of doing. I propose granting Mrs. Malfoy, hereafter known as Miss Narcissa Athena Black, her request of divorce from her current husband, Mr. Lucius Xavier Malfoy, and thirty percent of all income, as well as the Malfoy's summer home in France. I rest my case." Hermione seated herself next to Evan Carter.

"Thank you, Miss Granger, members of the jury?"

A short, round woman with flyaway black hair stood. "The jury grants Miss Narcissa Athena Black the deed to Chateau Malfoy, as well as thirty percent of her husbands fortune, as recommended by the attorney for the defense."

"Case dismissed." Minister Bones said smugly.

"Miss Granger, it appears I am indebted to you yet again." Lucius said smoothly as they stepped out of the Ministry phone booth once more.

"You are not indebted, Mr. Malfoy, you have paid me for my services, well above the requested salary." Hermione answered shortly.

"Of course. I trust you are well?"

Hermione stopped walking and turned to look at him curiously.

"The last time I saw you, you were in a state of distress, Miss Granger." Lucius supplied helpfully, "I believe you were crouching in an elevator?"

"I…erm…hadn't had my morning coffee." Hermione muttered, slightly embarrassed.

"I see." he smirked.

"Congratulations, Mr. Malfoy." Hermione offered her hand to him, and he took it, "You are a free man."

"Free, yes. But surely you can see my former wife and I haven't been 'together' for some time."

"I surmised as much, Mr. Malfoy, hence my focusing the jury's attention on her affairs and not yours."

"I noticed." he answered shortly, but Hermione had learned to hear the gratitude.

Or perhaps she had learned to look for it.


	9. Chapter 9:Visits and Errands

****

Word count: .Thanks to all my reviewers, especially SnapeSeraphin. Everyone go read her one shot "Extraordinarily convenient". Good stuff. grin

"Hermione, why in the bloody hell are you going to that man's house?" Harry hissed.

"Harry, it's my job. There's more papers for him to sign and I have to get a signature to transfer the rest of Narcissa's settlement." Hermione answered wearily.

"I don't like it. Why can't Evan go?"

"First of all, Evan is my assistant. He's not exactly certified, second, he's on holiday in Bermuda for a week."

"Evan gets a holiday?" Harry asked, momentarily distracted, "That bugger doesn't even work when he's at the office!"

"Even assistants get holidays, Harry." Hermione muttered.

"Hermione, you cannot go to Malfoy's house!"

Hermione slammed her briefcase shut, glaring angrily at her husband of a few short months. "I can, and I will."

She stomped out of the house and down the path, outside the fence, and Apparated to the employee entrance of the Ministry. Upon reaching her office, Hermione threw some green powder into the flames. She crouched onto the hard stone of the hearth, thinking absently that she needed to do something about the level of discomfort.

"Mr. Malfoy?" she called into the flames when a well furnished room came into view. Portraits aligned the walls, men with shockingly blonde hair and steel gray eyes stared down at her, as if judging her parentage by her very appearance. A small _pop_ sounded, and a House Elf appeared before her.

"Is Master Malfoy expecting Miss?" she squeaked fearfully.

"Ah…well, we didn't have an exact date set, but yes he did know I was coming at some point-"

"Blinky?" a familiar voice called, "What are you doing?"

"Master, there is a girl in the fire." Blinky answered frightfully. Hermione bristled slightly, she was twenty-three years old, thank you very much!

"A girl?" Lucius muttered, Hermione watched as the man came further into the room and knelt in front of the fire. "Ah, Miss Granger, always a pleasure." he nodded.

"Do you mind if I come through, Mr. Malfoy?"

"Not at all."

Hermione stood then, crouched, and stepped through the flickering poisonous green flames. She stumbled as her body spun out of the grate, and Lucius put steady hands on her shoulders to right her. He gestured for her to have a seat as she magically cleaned the soot from her robes.

"What can I do for you, Miss Granger?" Lucius asked politely.

"Well, there are still a few papers to be signed, "Hermione answered, ruffling through her briefcase and supplying the required parchments, "And there's the matter of transferring thirty percent of your Gringotts account to Miss Narcissa Black's new vault."

"Ah, yes that." Lucius Malfoy snapped his fingers once, and instantly a House Elf appeared at his heels. This one was different than the first, but appeared just as terrified. Hermione bristled slightly. "Donnie, please fetch me my traveling cloak." Lucius commanded, "Miss Granger will be accompanying me on an errand." The elf disappeared and then popped back into existence with a thick cloak folded in its arms. Lucius threw it around his shoulders while Hermione stood and made her way to the fireplace.

------At Gringotts------

"How may I help you?" a pinched looking goblin asked snobbishly.

"I want to transfer funds from my account to that of my former wife's." Lucius Malfoy answered confidently. The goblin looked up, meeting the eyes of Lucius, and his countenance improved greatly, showing much more respect to this esteemed customer.

"And what amount would you like to transfer?"

"Thirty percent."

The goblin looked up curiously, but said nothing. He slipped off the high stool he was seated on, and disappeared from sight. A few moments later the goblin returned with a slip of paper, and Lucius' vault key. He returned both to the customer and looked expectantly at the next person in line. Lucius put a strong hand on Hermione's arm and lead her from the bank, back down the cobbled street and into the Leaky Cauldron, where they Flooed back to his sitting room.

"The papers, Miss Granger?" Lucius asked politely, as if a jaunt to the bank was nothing out of the ordinary with the particular company he was entertaining.

"Er…right." Hermione handed him the parchments and he signed them, then looked at her expectantly.

"That's it, then." Hermione said as she stood up.

"Well, it was a pleasure, Miss Granger." Lucius said, "I trust I'll see you again?"

Hermione merely looked at him suspiciously, but said nothing. She threw shimmering green powder into the ornate fireplace and left without a word.


	10. Chapter 10: The Pub

****

528. Short but sweet, I need to get back in the swing of things. A series of hurricanes and loss of electricity for two weeks will knock you off the boat a bit.

Hermione sat solemnly on the uncomfortable barstool, nursing a strong fire whiskey, and heartache. Her best friend! Harry had been in bed with her best bloody friend! She couldn't very well blame Ginny. The girl had been infatuated with the boy hero for years, and Harry had returned her feelings for months. Hermione knew it. They weren't exactly good at hiding it. Funny thing is, everyone else in the Wizarding world seemed oblivious to it.

"Fill 'er up, Tom." Hermione slurred.

"I do think you've had quite enough, Miss." Tom smiled toothlessly.

"No, Tom, fill it up." Hermione said firmly.

"You heard the lady."

Hermione turned slowly on her stool, teetering slightly, and looked up into the face of Lucius Malfoy. She whirled around suddenly, grabbing the bar for support and cheekily rolling her eyes at Tom. "That one," she jerked her thumb in reference to Lucius, speaking as if he couldn't hear her in their close proximity, "He's trouble."

Tom gave Lucius a knowing look, which the blonde man returned amusedly. "Tom, do fill the lady's glass. A nice iced water will do her wonders, I believe."

Hermione mumbled something about "bloody blonde wizards" and "useless liquid". Lucius chose to take it as an invitation to be seated. He surveyed the mass of chestnut curls that had just began slamming itself repeatedly against the bar. With a raised eyebrow, he placed his palm under her forehead and lifted her face from the rough wood. A glassy-eyed but fierce glare was his reward.

"You, are a pain in my arse, Ma-" hiccup "-Malfoy!" Hermione glared.

"Likewise, Miss Granger." Lucius answered cordially, "Might I ask why you are in this charming state of intoxication?"

"THAT BLOODY BASTARD!" Hermione bellowed, slumping off of the barstool, righted by a passing wizard, to which she waved a hand in thanks.

"I presume we speak of your loving husband?"

"Loving…yes, he's loving alright." Hermione let out a very un-ladylike belch. "Not 'loving' me though, is he?"

"Might I ask who he is loving if it isn't his beautiful wife?" Lucius asked curiously.

"The…the…RON'S…" Hermione burst into loud, raking sobs, slamming her head down on the bar.

Lucius stared, clearly bewildered.

Hermione raised her head, muttering "ouch."

"Quite." was Lucius' interested response.

"He's …sleeping with her." Hermione sobbed. "With Ginny."

"The Weasley girl?"

Hermione nodded drunkenly.

"Miss Granger, I am extremely sorry."

"Eh…bloody prick. I knew it…all along!"

"Did you?"

"Oh absolutely." Hermione slurred, "They're always…always all over each other"

"How…oddly disturbing." Lucius sneered.

Hermione's head whipped around, and she glared at him fiercely. Suddenly seeming more sober, she was slightly more formidable. Lucius backed away slightly.

"You're mocking me." she glared.

"Never, Miss Granger. I would never enter a battle of wits with someone so pitifully unarmed."

"Ah, well…in that case then."

Hermione promptly passed out, crashing rather loudly and inelegantly to the floor.

-------------------------

Our heroine awakens, several hours later, in a heap on her couch. The warm lights of her flat blinded her momentarily. Hermione blinked into awareness.

Miss Granger,

I request your presence tomorrow, one o' clock sharp for lunch at the Third Cross.

Yours,

Lucius X. Malfoy

__

Bloody hell.


	11. Chapter 11: Finale

Hermione rolled her eyes heavenward at Lucius Malfoy's choice of dining establishments. _Third Cross_. As if Malfoy could be compatible with anything pure and Godly. Hermione's heels clacked a steady rhythm as she walked up the cobbled sidewalk towards the entrance of the grand and imposing building. Almost medieval architecture lined the eaves of the roof, with two menacing gargoyles perching near to the door. Hermione let out an involuntary shudder. _Lovely décor…I must get the name of their decorator_…Hermione smirked to herself. She pushed open the large polished wooden door.

"Name?" a stiffly dressed man with an upturned nose and air of self-proclaimed importance stare her up and down, standing behind a large podium directly in front of the entrance to the restaurant.

"Er…"

"Lucius Malfoy, party of two." a confident voice rang out from behind her. Hermione's glare narrowed, but she simply followed the waiter to their table, and said nothing.

"Miss Granger,…after our most interesting…meeting last night…" Lucius paused, seemingly uncomfortable. Hermione studied him momentarily. His face was just as haughty as it had been at every one of their past meetings, but something different glittered in his eyes. She was jolted back to awareness with his next question. "Is there anything I can do?"

"Pardon?" Hermione choked on her glass of water, eyeing the blonde man incredulously.

"Madam, you were in a charming state of intoxication, slurring on about the indignity of your bastard of a philandering spouse." Lucius' tone was dry, but his words meaningful.

"I assure you, Mr. Malfoy, there is nothing you can do to improve that matter." Hermione bit out scathingly.

"Perhaps I can…lend an ear of support, Miss Granger?" he offered tentatively.

"Why are you offering to help me?" Hermione asked curiously, "To _befriend_ me, by all accounts."

"Miss Granger, you have helped me out of many tight spots during these past few months. It is safe to say that I owe you enormously. I am willing to repay my debt, if need be, by talking and listening. Seemingly, that is an easy way out for me, am I correct?" Lucius answered her with a slightly condescending attitude, of which Hermione took note.

"So, you are doing this because you feel you are indebted. Well, don't worry yourself." Hermione stood to leave, but Lucius held a staying hand on her arm.

"Hermione, I am doing this because I chose to. Now, I can arrange for a lovely batch of Infertility Potion to slip into his afternoon tea…" an offered olive branch let slip from his mouth.

"Infertility…?" Hermione let the unasked question hang.

"Anyone who consumes the potion will be unable to…perform…for quite some time."

Hermione raised an eyebrow.

"Close to a week to be exact." Lucius smirked.

Hermione let out a bark of laughter, and with heads bent, the two quietly schemed, finding a common ground in their need for revenge upon a certain bespectacled man. The other diners gave no notice to the two cohorts, but they whispered still, reveling in their plans of mischief. Until a later time, we leave them to scheme and mastermind their way through their luncheon, into the late hours of the afternoon, when the owner comes to announce the closing of the establishment. Hermione and Lucius look to each other in shock, and an unspoken agreement is formed.

He shall be her savior, and she…his redemption.

-finite-

**Only 563 words, but I feel I can't take this any farther. Thanks so much to all of my loyal reviewers, you all know how the story ends. wink**

bigreader, I didn't kill them off…but I think you'll find Harry's punishment quite amusing after all…

CareBearErin, I think it's safe to say Hermione will remember her hangover potion from now on

Sarmoti, a sweet jerk? Oxymoron? Lol. Yes, hurricanes suck, but all is well now. I even got a nifty new computer. grin

SnapeSeraphin, ah well you know…writers block is a bitch.

Prin69, thanks for you (numerous) reviews!

**To everyone else THANKS! **

**I might just shoot out a one-shot tonight. But I'm not promising anything. wink**


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